Understanding our starting point for Abigail and we will progress from this virtue, according to the chronology of Abigail’s story, but first, to extract from the Websters 1928 app:
Understanding: 1. The faculty of the human mind by which it presents the real state of things presented to it, or by which it receives or comprehends the ideas which others express and and intend to communicate. 3. Intelligence between two or more persons; agreement of minds; union of sentiments. There is a good understanding between the minister and his people.
Additionally, understanding is a word related to authority. Understanding has to do with whose authority you stand under. Ultimate understanding therefore comes through submitting to God’s authority. And Abigail had an immediate understanding of the intensity of the situation her servants reported to her.
v17 “Now therefore, know and consider what you will do, for harm is determined against our master and all his household. For he is such a scoundrel that one cannot speak to him”
Household management. This conversation denotes the relationship that existed between Abigail and the servants. They may have been her husband’s servants “in name” but the level of familiarity in this relationship denotes many conversations had already taken place between them. Abigail portrays the virtue of managing her household well, including the treatment of her servants. They were comfortable enough to call Nabal a scoundrel without fear of repercussion from her. They also understood the level of responsibility she carried for her household affairs, and because of Abigails’s value and treatment of these servants, they understood they had recourse to take the matter to her. (And as a side note, if Nabal were alive today he would likely be termed a narcissist.)
v18 Then Abigail made haste and took two hundred loaves of bread, two skins of wine, five sheep already dressed, five seahs of roasted grain, one hundred clusters of raisins, and two hundred cakes of figs, and loaded them on donkeys.
Decision-making/Decisive action: Abigail knew when and how to take decision action. She may have been demeaned by Nabal, but she wasn’t a helpless woman and she didn’t waste a moment when every second mattered. She didn’t over analyze the situation or throw up her hands in despair. She simply did what needed to be done in that moment. Nothing more, nothing less. This is compounded wisdom.
Preparedness: Abigal’s is prepared. She’s in a state of readiness when the crisis occurs, she’s not caught off guard. “Five sheep already dressed” portrays Abigail is a woman who is prepared for any situation that might arise. “Two skins of wine” sounds a bit conservative for the number of David’s men and this may be an exercise of moderation on her part, due to being married to a man who likely overdrank. At any rate, Abigail understood the value of moderation.
v19 But she did not tell her husband Nabal.
Prudence: Abigail’s virtue here is that she knows when to exercise prudence, in this case a cautiousness in not telling her husband.
Prudent (straight from Websters 1828): Cautious; circumspect; wise in a practical manner; careful of the consequences of enterprises, measures or actions; cautious not to act when the end is of doubtful utility… But the prudent considers well his steps, Proverbs 14:15. A prudent man foresees evil and hides himself, Proverbs 22:3… Wise; Intelligent.
This is counter to what has been taught according to a traditional “patriarchal” church thinking (which has been handed down to us and has too often been unchallenged). And on a related note, there’s a broadened understanding today of mutual honor and women asking their spouses for a blessing rather than permission. The issue for Abigail was this - there was no time to get debate or argue this issue with Nabal. Lives were at stake and every moment counted. Abigail knew David was a man of action who would not take time to delay in plundering his enemy, and that hunger can be a wild driving force (causing recklessness).
v23 Now when Abigail saw David, she dismounted quickly from the donkey, fell on her face before David, and bowed to the ground.
Humility: (There’s a time to be dignified and there’s a time to be humble) and Abigail knew this was a time to posture herself in humility. She is approaching the man who would be king and she knows the wisdom of the posture of humility in presenting her case. And she exhibits honor in this posture of humility. She is a woman who carries herself with confidence and dignity, but this doesn’t preclude her from giving honor where honor is due.
v24 So she fell at his feet and said, “On me, my lord, on me let this iniquity be! And please let your maidservant speak in your ears, and hear the words of your maidservant.”
Responsibility: Here is where Abigail does what so many are unwilling to do – she takes personal responsibility - and for actions that are not directly her own, merely connected to her household. And she doesn’t presume anything. She doesn’t make any assumptions. She doesn’t let loose with a flood of words; she asks for permission to speak. Abigail is honoring David in every way possible.
v25 Please let not my lord regard this scoundrel Nabal. For as his name is so is he: Nabal is his name, and folly is with him! But I, your maidservant, did not see the young men of my lord whom you sent.
Abigail acknowledges the wrong done to David and his men. She acknowledges her husband’s actions were foolish and unwarranted. She makes no excuses for him. She makes sure to state these things before explaining she knew nothing of the matter. The case Abigail presents here is brilliant. She continues to exercise humility as she continues to honor David.
v27 And now this present which your maidservant has brought to my lord, let it be given to the young men who follow my lord.
Gift-giving: Abigail knows she is giving what should have been given in the first place. It’s food David and his men need. She knows her apologies and entreaties are worthless without the accompanying food. She knows the principle that when you stand before Kings you bring a gift. And that her gift, in this case food, will make room for her. She knows her apology is incomplete without the gift of food that had (already) been requested. She restores back to David, with honor, what should have already been his. And in this manner, her gift was connected to restitution.
v28 Please forgive the trespass of your maidservant. For the Lord will certainly make for my lord and enduring house, because my lord fights the battles of the LORD, and evil is not found in you throughout your days.
Apology and Forgiveness: Only after Abigail sets the tone for her apology to better insure it will be received does she make her official apology. Her apology includes a humble heart posture, acknowledgment of the wrong done, no presumption whatsoever, her emotions in check, and no insincere flattery, just straightforward honor. Her apology, like her entreaty, is brilliant.
v29-31 Yet a man has risen to pursue you and see your life, but the life of my lord shall be bound in the bundle of the living with the LORD your God; and the lives of your enemies He shall sling out, as from the pocket of the sling. And it shall come to pass, when the LORD has done for my lord according to all the good that He has spoken concerning you, and appointed you ruler over Israel, that this will be no grief to you, nor offense of heart to my lord, either that you have shed blood without cause, or that my lord has avenged himself. But when the lord has dealt well with my lord, then remember your maidservant.
Prophecy: Abigail now prophesies. Whether she realizes it or not she is prophesying – a blend of “fore-telling” and forth-telling.” Everything she speaks comes to pass. Saul ultimately loses his life in battle and Nabal’s life is “slung out” from him. Abigail has confident assurance over what God will do and she prophesies according to the measure of her faith.
Persuasion: A virtue of Abigail not to be overlooked, as she persuades David in a righteous manner; there is no manipulation whatsoever. And in the midst of her gentle persuasion she reminds David of who He is. She reminds David of his identity and actions fit for a king – to operate according to his God-given identity. And in the midst of Abigail’s persuasion is wise counsel. She knows how to give counsel in a way it can be (more readily) received. Because counsel, if not received, is of no use. Thus, Abigail exemplifying she is a woman of wisdom and understanding. And a sidenote, Wisdom and understanding often flow and pair together, as evidenced in Isaiah 11:2 and throughout the Proverbs.
v32-33 Blessed is the Lord God of Israel, who sent you this day to meet me! And blessed is your advise and blessed are you, because you have kept me this day from coming to bloodshed and and from avenging myself with my own hand
v35 See, I have heeded your voice and respected your person.
Here David acknowledges and gratefully receives Abigail’s counsel, and honors her in return. Abigail has proven herself to be a woman worthy of respect. Not by disrespecting David’s person, but by honoring him and respecting him. And here we have a picture of a man and a woman standing together, mutually honoring one another. In addition she has respected herself. Abigail’s husband may not have respected her, but she maintained respect for herself. Otherwise she could not have stood before David in the manner in which she stood. She didn’t allow her circumstance of being married to a fool affect her worth and dignity as a woman and this is her virtue. And in the end, she earns the respect of a king.
Meditative Scriptures:
She opens her mouth with wisdom, and on her tongue is the law of kindness. Proverbs 31:26
Listen, for I speak of excellent things, and from the opening of my lips come right things. Proverbs 8:6
Wisdom speaks: I love those who love me, and those who seek me diligently will find me. Proverbs 8:17
For whoever finds me finds life, and obtains favor from the Lord. Proverbs 8: 35
Questions:
How do you present your apologies?
Do your apologies include justifications?
Do your apologies include or exclude the word “but” at the end?
How well is your household prepared?
How long could your household weather a storm or survive a crisis?
How well is your vehicle prepared?
How do you employ persuasion?
From AI: (with Scripture added)
The art of persuasion in the Bible is rooted in reason, moral appeal, and divine empowerment. Not manipulation or coercion….Biblical persuasion is not about forcing beliefs but about changing hearts and minds through truth, trust, and the Holy Spirit’s work.
Key principles of Biblical persuasion include:
Gentleness and sincerity: Speaking with grace, humility, and respect.
Let your speech always be with grace, seasoned with salt, that you may know how you ought to answer each one. Colossians 4:6
Ultimately, while human effort and skill are vital, true persuasion is a work of the Holy Spirit…
We persuade others, not by human wisdom, but by the power of God.
Amen. May we learn the virtues of Abigail and put them into practice.
